Lubbock, I Love You, But It’s Too Dang Hot

Lubbock.

I love you.

I really, really do.

But we need to have a little talkie-poo about our little summer situation...

You see...

It's over.

The kids are back at school.

And it's still this damn hot out.

silver and black metal bar

It's not "maybe I should grab a bottle of water" hot. It's the kind of hot that would make you seriously consider calling in sick to your own wedding.

I have reached a point where my time spent "enjoying the outdoors" is just me, staring out the window while my air conditioner fights for its friggin' life.

Our cars are ovens with Bluetooth.

Our seatbelt buckles are branding irons.

If I get into the car with one more person who doesn't immediately put the keys into the ignition and run the AC, I might lose it. What the hell is up with you people who sit there and talk for 5 minutes before starting the car!? ABSOLUTELY NOT! I AM DYING!

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I'm sweaty.

All.

Day.

Long.

At this point, I'm not dressing for summer. I'm surviving. You might catch me in a loincloth if I'm forced to make a grocery run this evening. I've been surviving off of cereal for a week just to avoid walking through the parking lot of Walmart.

I simply cannot.

The second I find shade....no. No, I didn't.

It's gone.

I need the first genuinely cool evening to get here pronto.

Now.

PLEASE!

For the love of Texas Tech football and all things holy.

Please send us a snowstorm, Lord.

Amen.

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