Big 12 Football Teams as Halloween Candy
The Big 12 has been through the first third of its schedule and we're starting to figure out who these teams are in 2020. The Sooners lost a couple early but are rounding into form. Iowa State and Kansas State look to be exactly what everyone expected. Texas is back, oh wait not yet again.
Since it's Halloween season I thought it would be fun to match up each Big 12 football team with Halloween candy.
We'll start with the little Apple:
Kansas State - Plain M&M's
Old reliable. Nobody turns away plain M&M's. Every once in awhile Kansas State will even throw in a peanut M&M. Fancy.
Kansas - Peeps
Is this even candy? It's a marshmallow substance that looks like candy. Similarly, Kansas looks like a football team but is it really? The bottom line both peeps and Kansas are much better enjoyed in March.
Oklahoma - Reese's
It's the best until proven otherwise. A little one dimensional but can hold it's own.
Oklahoma State - Take 5
The most complete candy bar on the market. It's sweet and salty. It has a great balance. It's got chocolate, peanut butter, pretzels and more. Just like Oklahoma State is balanced and has a lot of weapons.
Texas - Three Musketeers
The Three Muskateers looks like a great candy bar. Its silver wrapper is crisp and classic. That tempered chocolate coating snaps under your teeth but once you bite into it it's mostly just air.
West Virginia - Junior Mints
It's a fine candy but it just doesn't really belong in the Halloween candy bin. West Virginia is fine but does it really belong in the Big 12?
Iowa State - Hersey's bar
It looks like a candy bar. It acts like a candy bar. It smells like a candy bar. But it's just so... boring. Sure you'll eat it. You aren't putting that in the giveaway pile, but is it going to be chosen over Reese's? or Take 5? Or any other candy bar that has a little more substance?
Texas Tech - Candy Corn
You wait all year for the candy corn. You haven't had it for months and so you build it up to be better than it really is. Then when it comes time to eat the candy corn it's just ok. It's not the worst. It's not the best. It's definitely recognizable.
TCU - Popcorn Ball
The popcorn ball is an enigma. If you don't know who made it you probably shouldn't eat it but it's always tempting. Surely it isn't poison. Right? What could go wrong? Why is there blood coming out of my eyes? Why am I so confused on offense when my defense has such a solid plan. Why do I feel an irresistible desire to bend down and tie my shoes?
Baylor - Travel Size Toothbrush
Just go away, Baylor. Nobody wants you. You're pretentious and overbearing.