Gary Patterson is trying to stir up trouble. Classic Gary. The story involves all the regulars for a Big 12 drama: The Oklahoma Sooners, Baker Mayfield and Texas Tech. It also involves a wildcard Aggie, so you know it'sa wild one.

It all stems from when Oklahoma and TCU played back on November 11th. The Sooners dominated the Horned Frogs, 38-20. Before the game, the TCU Horned Frogs had no way to get on the field because the sidelines were full. Coach Patterson instructed his players to run through the OU players who were warming up on the field. "Even as the head coach, I had to go through their warm-up lines to get down to our end of the field," he explained.

Here's where Gary Patterson starts to sound like a Scooby Doo villain.

Patterson digs deeper into the story only because Oklahoma Head Coach Lincoln Riley  had brought it up earlier in the week. "I wouldn’t have said anything if coach Riley hadn’t made the remark that our guy wouldn't have gotten hit with the ball if he hadn't run through the stretch lines," Patterson said. In other words, 'we would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for that coach and his pesky quarterback, too!'

There's an important part we've glossed over. Former Red Raider (and that distinction is actually important here) Baker Mayfield hit a TCU player in the head while the TCU players were running through the Sooners' warm-up lines.

"TCU in 20 years has never run through anyone's stretch lines," Patterson elaborated. "We don’t act that way. You've never seen us go out to the middle of the field and yell at each other and do all that. And we've had plenty of teams try to get us to do it. That's not the way we act."

That's right. TCU has never done anything like run on the field and yell or anything of the sort. This brawl between TCU and Baylor definitely happened last week.

Gary Patterson wasn't satisfied with only throwing Lincoln Riley under the bus. No, no -- that's not how Gary rolls. He's got to throw everyone who's affiliated with Texas Tech under the bus, too.

"I'm just gonna give you a little history," he said. (We love history, Gary -- go on.) "Baker [Mayfield] played at Texas Tech, and Lincoln [Riley] was at Texas Tech, and I have a coach that was at Texas Tech (Sonny Cumbie), and it was common practice." It's common practice to throw balls at opposing teams heads here in Lubbock, apparently.

Gary wasn't finished. "There was a Texas Tech, pretty well-known quarterback, that hit a guy from [Texas] A&M in the head, and they all thought it was funny to throw balls and do those kind of things. And it's their prerogative, they can do whatever they want to, we're just not going to here."

First of all, Gary is having to reach at least five years back for this one because Texas A&M left the Big 12 in 2012.

I have no idea who the well-known quarterback is that beaned the Aggie in the head, but I can guarantee that BJ Symons could still hit Patterson square in the sweaty visor from 50 or 60 yards out. I'm also pretty sure I would have a pretty good laugh if he had beaned any Aggie. That's just me, though.

After spending two minutes of his press conference bagging on anyone related to Texas Tech because they love to throw balls at opponents during pregame warm-ups, Patterson had the audacity to say: "I'm not going to make this game, because it's a championship game, about all that stuff. But if they want to bring it out into the open and they want to call us out they can do it." Then, like the whiner he is, Patterson adds: "They said we were the ones trying to cause all the problems. I beg to differ."

This isn't going on any bulletin boards in Norman just a few days before the rematch between TCU and Oklahoma for the Big 12 Championship, though. Coach Patterson just wants some good, clean fun. "We're going to play Saturday, and hopefully it'll be two football teams that are playing with high intensity the right way, without talking," he said.

I mean, Coach Patterson will only talk trash if Coach Riley does first. Like adults.

UPDATE: It wasn't BJ Symons.

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